They will repent

They will repent for the sins they have committed, I will go about the right way...My plan is simple...gather evidence and show it to their employer.....Job done.....You bitches will pay....Now go to sleep :) AMAZING DAY AWAITS YOU!!

Who do I want to be?

In all my vagueness of success, I have forgotten specific goals to target. Recently, I have been so obsessed with business I have not cared about health or my image and so it has taken a beating. Its alright tho, I have noticed that how my self development had come to halt and even regressed a little during past month.

 So to keep things specific I will write who do I want to be and how? Firstly,  I would to create a person that I have always wanted to be and start on that journey.

1. Confident and courageous : I am confident but not in all things, sometimes I come across as timid. There is a past related issue, some aggression but I have managed to become playfully confident for short while nonetheless...Thanks to the chess.  From now I will go further than affirmations and look for ways to optimise my confident. 
2. Intelligent and creative Scientific and systematic : On this aspect I have improved greatly,  I have worked my ass off and made my lifestyle, passion around it for me to become much more smarter than I was. Now, its time to progress into practical intelligence..such as Business acumen, Social and emotional intelligence, while developing on going progress
3. Fun, witty, great to be around : Not to be a people pleaser but I have recently, lost the sparkle towards social stuff. It needs to come back, specially with Playfully confident and fun, witty it would be brilliant combination to my core personality...who has such good energy. If were to become Fun and witty...energy around me would be super!!
4. POSITIVE and optimistic with a plan aka develop great attitude : I have improved greatly on this the recent times but at core there is still some negativity....I will need to heal it with positive and optimistic view!!! There was a book about becoming Optimistic with a plan!! (similar tone and that is how I would like to be)
5. Strategic, tactical and ambitious : I have always been ambitious but lacked the know how and belief to pull it off...I have developed in being strategic and tactical in novice way but I have tons to learn..at the end of the day, all the words a game and us players..who ever plays the best are winners.
6. Faith Belief and trust : I lack this deep belief within me, I used to have ti when I was young but lost it somewhere during the dark times....Now I will develop it, not just paper crack belief but deep Faith belief and trust that I can do anything I set my mind to 
7. Healthy and fit, care: Past month I was lazy and didn't do any workout and now my body is suffering....and it can be seen visibly by others...such same to let Ferrari of body rust!!  I need to take care of my self.
8. Proactive assertive and sharp : I need to develop more proactive attitude and approaches..STOP BEING LAZY!!!!! and BE SHARP..
9. Love and care : I need to love myself and others. Take care of my health in every aspect such as mentally, physically, emotionally etc....
10. Let go of past and BE ADAPTIVE, Be COOL:): I do have an attitude problem not in horrible way but a flaw that can lead to poor outcome and so I would like to develop RIGHT ATTITUDE. Finally, the past that is heavy...some I have let do some I haven't which is forcing me to be not adaptive!! ADAPT, THRIVE!!! LET GO OF THE BAGGAGES :)

I know you can do this! I have been too broad! Now I will think, write in very specific manner, also with goals that I can work towards and not vague terms. 

Be grateful

Sometimes in life we are so caught up in our tiny problems, chasing those dreams, goals etc..beign tied down by our own thoughts we forget....How blessed we are...How abundant the universe is and how beautiful our life is....

In these moments of life you have to take a deep breath and be grateful...What am I grateful for?

This beautiful life
This beautiful opportunity I have
My health, my wealth, my family
The love that comes towards me
The everyday people I meet good or bad everyone with lessons to learn
The talented brain I have when applied can achieve anything
SOOOOO MUCH Opportunity
Ambitions! Dreams! Faith! Love! Positivity! Intelligence
The ability and the environment where I can apply it and achieve it.
The beautiful classy girls that I attract despite me being an asshole sometimes..


Sometimes I am so focused on solving the problem I get lost in it and lose sight of what I have!! Its beautiful and so much potential....I feel blessed..Thank you universe for reminding me...I shall be grateful for what I have till the rest of my life.!!!

THANK YOU, may love and peace touch every one and everything in this universe.

Love

After asking questions of not only what makes money and what market wants...but also what truly drives me and things that I love?

I have realised with right strategy, tactics, mindset..I could succeed anywhere....and even higher chances of succeeding in fields that I am passionate about, understand and can be my strength!  I read tons of books all beatingt he same thing but for me some reason i didn't quite catch it!! you know..(I need to work on this)

Either way, This feeling it feels as tho I have been away from the girl I love for too long, too far....chasing that elusive mirage...but now the universe has sent me a message that its better to go ahead together....with my heart! and so this feel like going back to the my lover who is waiting for me.....to come back and then take on what lies ahead together :)

Do not throw it away

YEs you have been obbssed with ENT but you taking the wrong approach.

1. Approach it with positivity and abundance, don't take the negative emotions in it
• Get rid of those negative emotions, you gotta get go of these burden and negativity that comes to you...USe you joy and laughter to change the vibe!!
• LEARN THE POSITIVE WAY, the champion way!!!! RID OF NEGATIVITY!!!
2. Do not throw away your UI/UX thing...this ha immense potential entrepnueraly such as
• Build apps for technology stuff!!! Talking about Billions here and constant opportunity!!!!
• You are also passionate about the user psychology  which is always helpful in any kind of venture you take on....and currently your budding ENT plant needs all the nutritional and direction it can get and this field is run comes in contact with great entrepreneurs.
• The things you learn here...can me used to find THAT IDEA that eludes you!!!!!!!! and the skills that you will learn means you will only need a developer in your team as you can do the business and design side of things...NOW HOW FUCKIGN AWESOME IS THAT
• Don't throw all these away for a cut throat competitive place where it can all dissaper one day...saying that DO IT ON THE SIDE!!!!! just to get you feet wet....
• STAY ON COURSE
• STAY ON PLAN. 

My fire

I have found my fire back, now its time to redirect it and refine it into a shiny diamond. Yeah my conditioning led me to be "that" but now, since my fire is back being "that" will only make it smell and worse make others against it...another conditioning patterns..

Now its time to burn the fire even brighter..say turn up the volume but do it in a nicer way, in a new way that you know is the right way. Let go of the old patterns, and develop new ones..won't be easy but it will be amazing!

Racism again

After such serenity of dreaming, building and learning of a month where it was awesome and part time work in between. I have to go back to daily routine...and once again confront the toxic waste called Racisim.

Once again I was affected by it, angry upset and the low value people successfully dropping me from high energy to anger..I do know I to use my anger into force that can be used for studies, entrepreneurship etc. But its not really a nice approach as it leaves me cold and because I become so driven I might hurt the wrong people....

Either ways I want to come from a source of abundance! And thank god for this video I found on youtube which evoked what I felt and solidified my reasoning and added new insights!! Thank you for your analogy of two buildings...ones who build and ones who ruin to feel good.

This deeper understand brought me deep peace and back to my high energy and high level thinking!

My classmates who have been intimidated by my awesome project as resorted to this toxix and disgusting behaviour...Well I will play their game not as a aggressor but as a grand master...I seek not to destroy and waste my energy on this bull shit task..and so I will only focus on SUCESS!!..

I live by the philosophy of Kill them with success bury them with a smile! and that will be my ultimate victory! :)